Which is fear.
Specifically, my fear. The fear I've lived with for as long as I can remember. The fear of allowing myself to be who I am. Because if I am who I am chances are nobody will like me.
You're forgiven for not knowing I had this problem. I think I've been pretty successful at hiding it from everyone - including myself. I'm told I can look pretty scary. That's just camo paint. Deep down I've been scared of being me all my life.
I'm done with that, and I'm done hiding. And this is why this project is so important to me. Because it is in part my way of coming out of my closet, as it were, but more importantly my way of conquering that fear. And possibly, if I do it right, help other people conquer theirs.
It's a very worthy goal that is a lot more important than just the karate part.